Characters:
Morpheus –
Marius –
Cossette –
Signora –
The narrator – yours
truly.
Settings: Victorian age—although dressing need not follow, improvisation is advised.
Act one scene 1:
Limbo. Morpheus and Marius stand depressed. They are holding knifes in
their hands and are suicidal.
BGM: a silent letter
Morpheus: (brandishing
knife and shows audience wrist) From today onwards, I, Morpheus, shall
be no more! Lost to this vile (gestures at Marius with hatred) Marius,
and worse—defeated by a woman!
Marius: And I, my
beloved.
(looks up profoundly at the sky) There is no reason for
me to live anymore, not after what has happened! Aye, I have lost to Morpheus,
too, but it is no great deal. What is worse is… the thought of facing the
world when my lady has run away with a woman!
Morpheus: (shakes
head) Although you have caused my downfall, you share the same woes
with me.
Marius: Ah! (scrutinises
Morpheus)
You! (looks exhilerated) Fate bears us with so hard a hand. Men,
when suffering the same fate, are bonded by destiny.
Morpheus: (skeptical)
Same fate?
Marius: Our fate.
(Light of limbo dims,
Morpheus and Marius freeze)
Narrator: And so,
Marius' and Morpheus' pasts shall unfold, and their tales retold.
And all these, upon this
day,
Attention to this, audience
must pay
In that all we say or portray
Is but a play within
a play
—Therefore, seek not to
sue us.
(exuent Narrator)
Act two scene 1:
Romantic atmosphere. Cossette and Marius, alone. Marius is wooing Cossette,
and has a flower in hand.
BGM: anemone, L'Arc~en~ciel
Marius: Pardonez
moi, for I am here. My heart is bursting, I could not live as I was—I have
come. Do you recognise me at all, my lovely lady?
Cossette: (scrutinises
Marius like he has three eyes) And your name is?
Marius: My name—Oh,
but what is in a name, but mere—name? I am a fool, for it is a fool's prerogative
to utter truths that which no one else will speak—I have seen thee at the
square, and upon first sight, hath fallen in love with thee!
Cossette: 'Tis nice,
but still I know not your name.
Marius: A name is
but a name, but my mother calls me—Marius. A suave name, is it not? Say,
what about you, my fair angel?
Cossette: Know not
thou? Cossette.
Marius: You love
me then?
Cossette: I would
say… (hesitates)
I hate not you, but…
Marius: Ah! You love
me! (grabs hold of Cossette's shoulders) In delay there lies
no plenty; then come kiss me, fool that I may be. Youth's a stuff that
will not endure. (swoops Cossette down in a kiss dramatically)
Mmmmph.
Cossette: (struggles)
(Marius lets go)
(Freeze Marius)
Cossette: (to
the audience)
Oh innocent victims of Marius, remember this terse little
verse; to let a fool kiss you is stupid, to let a kiss fool you is worse.
(Marius unfreezes)
Marius: The universe
hangs on a kiss, exists in a hold of a kiss. The word kiss must've been
invented by poets to rhyme with bliss. Let us begin our boy-girl relationship,
my lovely lady.
Cossette: (nods)
(Freeze Marius)
Cossette: (to
audience) I hope he is a weathy fool.
(Marius unfreezes,
and they exit the stage together, hand in hand.)
Act two scene 2:
Morpheus and Signora are fighting off evil.
BGM: The Beautiful People,
Marilyn Manson
(Signora stands
alone on the stage, admiring the weather.)
Signora: Ah! The
break of a new season. The weather is so nice!
Mafia: (imitates
Saturday Night Fever) M! A! F! I! A! I am the... Mafia.
Morpheus: Leave her
alone!
Signora: (clings
to Morpheus)
Mafia: (evil laughter)
(pulls out tiny waterguns, two on each hand)
Morpheus: Uh-oh.
Signora: Aha! Wait
a moment, you both. (runs backstage and pulls out a Super-Soaker) Here,
use this.
Morpheus: Thank you!
(takes Super-Soaker, the sound of gunshots is heard)
Mafia: Arrrrgh! I am defeated!
(runs helter-skelter offstage)
(BGM Stops)
Morpheus: There!
The villains have been defeated, and I have saved you from the clutches
of these mafia.
Signora: My hero!
(examines
Morpheus' forehead) You are hurt! Let me dress
your wounds.
Morpheus: Ow! Oh
the villains have hurt me bad. (overdramatically) I feel faint.
(staggers)
Signora: Oh dear!
I'm sure I have a bandaid somewhere. (Takes out elastoplast and pastes
it onto
Morpheus' forehead) Poor Morpheus! You have risked your
life to protect me.
Morpheus: It is the
job of a gallant hero. (looks into Signora's eyes)
Signora: Oh! Morpheus.
Morpheus: Oh! Signora.
(takes hold of her hands and starts dancing with her)
(they dance for two minutes)
Signora: Oh, how
time flies when one has fun!
(silence) (Cossette
enters)
Morpheus: (sees
Cossette walking down the stage)
Cossette: (to
the audience) I have met a boy; I do not know if he is my type. I wonder
if he reaches my criteria—for I want to live the life of a rich tai-tai.
Morpheus: (To
the audience) What a beautiful lady! Signora's charm fades off in this
lady's presence. (to Signora) Please pardon me, but I have to use
the gent's.
Signora: (unknowingly)
Oh! Sure.
Morpheus: (approaches
Cossette)
My fair lady, what art thou doing here, all by yourself?
Cossette: Pondering,
my heart awary, as I know not whether my prince has money.
Morpheus: When you
find him poor, come to me; I have cash and cars, credit cards and bungalows.
Name what you will, and come to me, my love.
Cossette: And your
name?
Morpheus: Morpheus.
Cossette: I am Cossette.
Morpheus: Now if
you will pardon me, I have plans to play golf with my buddy (on the
wall flashes a George W Bush picture. This is done by Powerpoint, with
a black background that shows a blank black screen by the next click.)
Bushie (gestures to the screen) . Till the next time we meet,
Cossette.
Cossette: Fare thee
well!
Act two scene 3:
Cossette
meets with Marius. Cossette is alone on stage, as she has planned to meet
Marius to plan for V.day.
Cossette: Ah! 'Tis'll
be Valentine's day in a week's time. I must know, by now, if Marius has
a car and a bungalow and lots of cash. 'Tis will not do if he is a poor
fool—I only take rich fools.
(enter a cheerful Marius)
Marius: Greetings,
my gentle Cossette! Why, a happy to-be Valentine's day to my to-be Valentine!
Cossette: (gently)
Now it is nearing Valentine's day, do let us share our pleasures and woes;
tell me, Marius, art thou willing to forsake everything for me?
Marius: (unhesitatingly)
All
that I have!
Cossette: (sweetly)
And what do you have?
Marius: A true love,
my body, three francs and twenty sous, my breeches, my vest…
Cossette: (disappointed)
Not a car?
Marius: well, I have
this.
(holds up a toy car) Hot Wheels, LEADING THE WAY~!!
Cossette: (sobs)
I have wasted my time on a poor fool!
(tears away from Marius)
Fare thee well, Marius! I have Morpheus, and he has cash, a bungalow, and
a
real car!
(Cossette flees
from the stage)
Marius: (speechless)
(silence) (meanwhile,
the sound of crickets could be heard going "ribbit, ribbit".)
Marius: (blinks)
….(stands there, examines his car, takes some coins out of his wallet
and examines them) ….I fail to see what is so great about Morpheus!
After all, I am charming and gallant—surely Cossette loves me truly. But
to be sure, I will SMS her with my love messages, and see if she will reply.
(Takes out handphone, starts pressing with animated expressions, kisses
handphone after he's done.) … There! She will be putty in my mobile
phone.
(exeunt Marius)
Act three scene 1:
Confrontation between Marius and Morpheus.
BGM: a silent letter,
L'Arc~en~Ciel
Marius: I have pondered
for a week, and a week on end. Now it is Valentine's day, and still I could
not comprehend—Why did dear Cossette leave me? What can I do? Tell me,
and I shall do it. My life is hers' and I would give the last drop of blood
in my body for her.
Morpheus: (appears
with Cossette) My young sir, I do not ask so much as that, not the
last!
Marius: What, Cossette?
(anguished)
Cossette! You have left me for another man! Made me
a cuckold, this I could behold, but the fact that you left me alone, and
alone henceforth!
Cossette: (turns
away) What, know I thou?
Marius: My dear Cossette!
Morpheus: (spurns
on Marius) You! You are no longer her lover. Stop pestering her! All
we ask is for your forgetfulness, aye, to stop bothering Cossette and stop
SMSing her with all your foolish messages!
Cossette: (takes
out handphone) Shalt I read this aloud? "O, my dear Cossette, I love
thee!" "Come forth be my bride!" "I forgive thee for leaving me, so feel
free to come back."
Marius: (bangs
his head against a tree)
Morpheus: Know this:
My lady here detests your every silly message!
Cossette: Foolish
enough as it is.
Marius: (despaired)
Oh! Cossette! Thou called me a fool?
Cossette: Of course.
(enter Signora,
freeze everyone else)
Signora: Why, heard
I this commotion in the day, and my house being near, I could take no time
to sleep. I thought I have heard Morpheus' voice, and yet it seems to be
a dream, or possibly a poorly enacted play—Morpheus! He hasn't kept in
touch at all.
(everyone else
unfreezes)
Signora: (wanders,
notices the commotion) Oh! Morpheus!
(joyfully runs towards Morpheus)
Morpheus: Yes, a
fool, for Cossette is mine and mine alone—you, without your cash and fame!
Signora: What….?
(stops dead in her tracks)
Morpheus: (notices
Signora) What… Signora?
Signora: Thou heartbreaker!
Morpheus: Let me
explain myself!
Cossette: No more!
This is enough. To be manipulated by men, all my life. Rich and poor fools
alike. I have had enough! (shakes head) …No more.
Signora: Poor dear!
We share the same plight. (glares once at Morpheus and Marius)
(BGM stops)
Cossette: (addresses
Morpheus and Marius)
I thus give you a chance to redeem yourselves, if you still claim to love
me.
Signora: And I shall
be the judge. Whoever loses shall be my slave, and beware! For my wrath
is great.
Cossette: (to
Signora) Ah! You are on my side.
Signora: (glares
at Morpheus with venom) It is my (spits out the word)
pleasure.
Marius: I join! For
my love is great.
Morpheus: I join!
For my mother wants me to marry Cossette and my love for my mom is great.
Cossette: What say
we hold as the first event? A… Mortal Battle?
Marius and Morpheus:
Aye, no problem!
Signora: (irritated)
Chop! Chop! Positions! Get into positions!
(Morpheus and
Marius get into positions) (BGM: No Shelter, Rage Against
The Machine)
Signora: And thus…
Remember this, you have chosen to partake upon this mortal battle of your
own will. If you should lose any limb,
do hesitate to sue us as
we have already read the disclaimer to you beforehand. (claps hands) On
the count of three—One, two, three! Begin!
Morpheus: I will
kick your butt!
Marius: I will wrench
your skin from your face!
(Morpheus and each other
in slow-mo. Scissors Paper Stone—Morpheus wins first round, punches Marius.
These all happen in slow-mo. Marius wins second round, takes the opportunity
to kick Morpheus, but Morpheus steps back. They take part in slow-mo sparring
(only after each round of scissors paper stone. They fight until BGM
stops. finally Morpheus hits Marius once, and Marius falls back,
in slow-mo, to the ground.)
Marius: Urrrrgh!
Signora: K.O.! Morpheus
wins; Marius loses!
Marius: (begs
Signora)
Oh! Please do not pronounce me the loser! Let's have
three rounds. Three rounds! Whoever wins two rounds will win the hand of
Cossette! Please!
Signora: Well, what
do you think, Cossette?
Cossette: I fancy
that a fair deal.
Signora: What say
we let the second round be a verbal spar? First the physical aspect, then
the intellectual.
Cossette: Why, good
idea! That is so much smarter a way than to judge a man by his wealth.
(Meanwhile, Marius and
Morpheus are comparing muscles)
Signora: Separate,
boys. Round two shall be verbal sparring. Art thou ready?
Morpheus: Since Marius
lost the first round, he may start with the second.
Signora: Noted. And
thus, we begin!
(BGM: Rock Is Dead,
Marilyn Manson)
Marius: Very well.
(pause) I am a lion, teeth-gnashing, Morpheus-biting. (makes
the motion of a lion scaring Morpheus)
Morpheus: (haughtily)
I am a hunter, horse-riding, gun-wielding.
(takes up the posture
of holding a gun)
Marius: (not missing
a beat) I am a horse-fly, horse-stinging, hunter-throwing.
Morpheus: I am a
spider, web-spinning, horse-fly-eating.
Marius: (to audience)
Ah! I know the pattern by which he is going now. If I shall lead him to
the right direction, he will fall flat on his nose. (chuckles) I
am the earth, spider-housing, life-nurturing.
Morpheus: (evil
flicker in eyes) I am the nova, heat-generating, earth-destroying.
Marius: (knows
that he will win)I am the universe, nova-encompassing.
Morpheus: (smiles
serenely) I am the Ends of time and space, I am beyond time and beyond
space; universes in my presence flicker and flash and fade.
Marius: (Folds
his arms, cunningly) I am… Hope.
Morpheus: (hesitates)
I… I don't know.
(BGM stops)
Signora: Ah! K.O!
Marius wins; Morpheus loses.
Cossette: But that
makes it a draw.
Signora: All the
better! We shall enjoy a show. (to Marius) 'Tis a brilliant show
of wisdom, young lad.
Marius: Oh! If only
Cossette thinks so.
Cossette: Do not
praise these MCPs; they shall only swell and get their heads stuck at the
door. Say, since they are of the MCP, why don't we hold an election?
Signora: Good idea!
An election! Ah, a symbol of the modern ages, from the olden regime of
suppression to freedom! It is indeed, a wise idea.
Cossette: Yes! We
could create the land of the free with elections.
Signora: This shall
be the final, then. Oh, and we must clarify this—(to Morpheus) no
Florida revote, if you may, (on the wall flashes a George W Bush picture.)
friend of Bushie (gestures to the screen) or not.
Morpheus: (mumbles)
Yes, your ladyship.
Signora: Well—we
do lack an opposition. I guess I shall form the chairperson of the FCP—Female
Chauvinist Party.
Morpheus and Marius:
What? A WOMAN running for ELECTION?
Signora: (Indignantly)
And why not? It is indeed a democracy, is it not? No one owes you
a living.
Marius: Pledge ourselves
as one united nation, regardless of race, language or religion—it says
nothing about gender.
Morpheus: Indeed,
indeed.
Signora: Nonsense!
There surely must be a creed somewhere that you have overlooked.
Marius: (desperately)
What sayeth thou, Cossette?
Cossette: I don't
see why not. After all, we are liberating members of the female gender,
and it would be unfair to alienate them in election…
Signora: Ah! So,
let us begin. Morpheus shall go first, since he has lost in the previous
round. Introducing candidate Morpheus, of the Male Chauvinist Party. (pulls
out a chair)
Cossette: (claps
daintily)
Morpheus: (climbs
onto chair)(ponders) Vote for me, Cossette!
(seriously) For
my love is great and my devotion even greater. I own a car and a bungalow,
and if you will be my bride, I shalt provide you with the finest spices
from the East Indies—and yes, even a huge pot of sugar and fine silverware
that once the parishioners of Rome used! And if nothing else persuades
thou, then I shall simply tell the government to stop upgrading your HDB
flat.
(climbs off chair)
Marius: (to the
audience)
It is unfair! He has strings to pull. But no fear—I have
charm.
Signora: Your turn,
Marius.
(Cossette and
Signora clap)
Marius: (climbs
onto chair)
No doubt this is my first election, and I am proud to be
here for the first time. (clears throat)
Lady Cossette, it is my
pleasure to be up here today, indeed—for have you noticed the lack of democracy
in rich families? They listen to everything the old say and the young have
no lives of their own. With me, a poor fool, it shall be different. We
shall have freedom, we shall have democracy. Do you not desire that carefree
life, my dear Cossette? (pause)(climbs off chair)
Signora: And my turn.
I am Signora.
(Cossette and
Signora clap)
Signora: As I am
the only female candidate in this election, I am the only candidate who
will be able to experience and understand the plights that women face in
this society. In this male-dominated relationship, it is only right to
have a woman play a part, as a woman can help you fight for your rights.
I believe that I Will be able to help you fight for your rights, simply
because I am a woman and I understand what it is like to be one. Of course,
the MCP wouldn't.
Cossette: (claps)
Ah! This is a convincing speech, indeed. I shalt vote for thee, Signora!
Signora: Ah! So I
have won the election!
Cossette: Why yes
indeed, for you were the most convincing and sincere candidate in the election.
Marius and Morpheus:
(stare open-mouthed)
Cossette: And the
winner is… Signora. Thus, fare thee well, Marius and Morpheus. I am leaving
with Signora.
Signora: (Smiles
briskly, wraps an arm around Cossette's shoulder and marches off proudly)
Marius and Morpheus:
(stare open-mouthed) ….Oh, My God!
Act four scene 1:
a limbo, conclusion.
Narrator: And this…
Is the story of the two men's downfall.
Morpheus: Now it
is time… Time for us to die. Time for the dark, dark wings of death to
engulf us. Time for the blood to flow, and for the thorns of the blue rose
to pierce through our hearts.
Marius: Hey, wait
a minute, Morpheus. We share the same fate—we do have much in common,
don't we?
Morpheus: (shocked)
I
beg your pardon?
Marius: Say, aren't
thou cold?
Morpheus: Why, since
it is wintry, I must admit…
Marius: Let me spare
thee my warmth!
Morpheus: What! (backs
away slowly)
Marius: Warmth! Let
me share with you my warmth!
Morpheus: Noooooooo……!
(slits wrist, dies)
BGM: a silent letter,
L'Arc~en~Ciel
Marius: Morpheus!
(kneels down besides Morpheus, holds Morpheus' hand) Oh, such grievous
and unbearable sorrow! (shakes Morpheus' hand a little) Morpheus?
Morpheus? Jesus! He's expired so soon. (shakes head) And to think
I contemplated the possibility of getting him a rose for today, Valentine's
day—oh, sorrow, sorrow. (stands up) But now that you're dead, Morpheus,
don't think you're so great! You have one rose less for Valentine's Day!
HAH! (turns away with crossed arms indignantly)
(Silence)
Marius: (turns
back, heaves a sigh) Party pooper, you!
(storms away angrily)
(Marius exits, leaving
Morpheus' corpse in the limbo)
(limbo fades)
The BGM plays louder
and louder until it becomes a theme song.
(The crew comes out and
takes a salute.)
The End.
voidmatsumoto@yahoo.co.uk