I’ve always been so useless.
Looking back into my memories, I see nothing but grief, and continuous pain. Being cursed, being mocked, being beaten—— all these I had bore with gritted teeth; because I was never powerful enough to resist, to protect myself.
But my memories, bleak as they are, do contain joy. Immense joy. When I was with Tetsu, I knew nothing except pure happiness. Looking at him, kissing him, holding him in my arms and being held by his—— I was so content and so much in love. The sweetness of his smiles, the softness of his eyes, they are my most precious treasures. I promised myself that I would guard them safe forever.
But I was, and am, useless.
Out of hatred and cowardice, Tetsu was torn away from me. I could not prevent it. They deemed our love ‘forbidden.’ I was beaten and humiliated. Deep inside me, however, I didn’t care. I didn’t care how much they hated me, because when I thought about how Tetsu might be suffering, my own pains were nothing. And in my dreams I kept seeing my beloved crying. Beautiful tears; but oh, they were sacred! Tet-chan, oh, Tet-chan, I’m so sorry…
Then I was bathed and made beautiful, my flaws deceivingly covered. They put me to the sea, and the sea grasped me, took hold of my very being. I bordered on unconsciousness; the small segment of my mind was not filled with fear of death, but was screaming my love’s name. TETSU!
My whole body bled! I felt I was crying blood tears. What had happened to Tetsu? I wanted to break away from the horror. I wanted to save my lover.
…But I was a useless weak thing.
And then I was merely
floating in the embrace of the dark sea… until one day the star fell and
saved me from the nightmare again.
“Stop it! Hyde… Hyde!”
“Please… Don’t come after me anymore…”
“Hyde! No…!”
Tetsu’s pained cries almost made Hyde turn back to gather him into his arms and to soothe him. But, biting on his lower lip, the brunet kept on running. The roaring sea was so near now. Hyde looked ahead of him, and a sudden wave of rue immediately hit; but the tears didn’t come. In fact, the wild fluttering of many, many emotions all grew calmer and calmer as he moved closer to the sea.
How menacing the storm was, how demanding. Hyde knew it was coming for him, as it always was.
He was thinking about nothing but Tetsu now.
For the past few days, he had experienced once more the ecstatic happiness as he had years and years ago. They had finally met again. They loved each other. And the love they shared together, even for only so short a period of time, was greater than any pain his past wounds could inflict after the recovery of his memories. It was far from enough—— Oh, how could he ever get enough of Tetsu! —— but at least it could make him die now with some tranquility. He knew he was going to die again. The sea was bound to take his cursed life his every lifetime. And he also knew that if he offered himself, there would be no harm done to the others. Tetsu would be safe—— That was what mattered.
He stopped at the edge of the water. The whipping wind slashing at his hair, his skin, were like chilly blades; but the water about his feet had calmed, and strangely felt like lover’s caresses as it moved to surround him. “……” Hyde’s thick black hair flied wildly about his face, which showed nothing but determination.
“Hyde!”
Tetsu.
Hyde looked back and saw Tetsu, who was trying to reach him, but was prevented by the great storm. He was looking at him in wide-eyed panic, his long, crimson hair were like flames, contrasting strongly with his pale complexion. How breathtaking a sight…
A smile found its way to Hyde’s lips. He loved Tetsu so much.
I don't want you to protect me; I want to protect you.
Let me protect you.
Tetsu looked, terror-stuck, at his lover’s frail figure by the sea.
He couldn’t let Hyde be separated from him again! But his power… what happened to his power? Why couldn’t he break through this storm?
“Hyde!… Hyde!” He cried in anguish.
“Tetsu!” A voice called from behind.
The Star had not a chance to react before a pair of strong arms enfolded him. Sakura’s worried face looked down at him. “What the hell is going on? Are you okay, Tetsu?”
The warmth and comfort of
his embrace made Tetsu’s eyes brimming with tears at once. “Oh, Sakura!
It’s happening again… Hyde—— He’ going to die!”