"It is a fool's prerrogative to utter truths that which no one else will speak."
-- Sandman, Neil Gaiman

  Perhaps I am a fool, for I shall say the truth that no one else speaks of. Or perhaps the truth that only insolent fools speak of to get bashed by a couple of insane fangirls.

  As a matter of fact, when I, Lucifer, began writing these Gundam fanfictions (namely trowa x quatre and heero x duo), I was subjected to a couple of influences, the first being previous Gundam fanfictions. I have recieved a couple of letters praising my work, and for that I feel amused. Having evolved somewhat since my most ancient and crude endeavours, I do not deem what I have written to be worthy of praise.
  The second was, of course, sex that was inevitably added to Gundam fanfiction. My objective to write this fanfiction when I began was to blend in with the rest, to write something that everyone else has written so as to gain popularity and words of affirmation. The result was to contribute to the depreciating qualities of anime fanfiction in general. Experience has shown me, however, that crap like this actually gain affirmation, even if they cannot be considered as "classics" that would be revered thereafter in the short life span of
the fanficdom.

  I did not realise the cold and harsh truth when I wrote these fanfictions; it was when my friend, hidoko, had done greater achievements that put the once-amatuer me to shame. And where it lay cold and harsh was that in reality, although substantial fanfictions have been remembered by certain people who actually bother to remember, they gain little words of affirmation, and this is what saddens me. The lack of appreciation lead to the depreciating quality level in fanfiction in general. Good fanfiction has dwindled since their authors get little comments while mindless fanfiction has flourished greatly like the rise of Nazism before WWII. Without hesitation I direct this explicitly at the Jrock fanficdom, and possibly, the Anime fanficdom (from which I'd long since withdrawn).
  I have concluded that the sole reason that I have gained affirmation for these two fanfictions is because, first, I have written the "traditional pairings" into play; second, I have used the "traditional" format (inclusive of lemon profiles); third, I have written the "traditional" fanfiction.
  I suppose the last one isn't quite as controversial as the first two, since fanfiction is, afterall, subject to the fandom of the anime or rock group itself. Yet it saddens me to know that none would open his or her mind to something great and powerful simply because it is about another world that one has never understood.

  Finally, these two fanfictions were written to accomodate my learning of writing lemon profiles. The only reason that these two fanfictions are being archived is that they have archival values, just like most of the original and anime fanfiction (and some of  the jrock fanfiction).
  As a matter of fact, I am a split personality of hidoko Matsumoto and xz0ner. I am , rather inevitably, a part of these two personalities, and therefore, I play a crucial part in their evolution as well. The fiction that I have written was but a stepping stone for both hidoko Matsumoto's and later, xz0ner's writing progress.
  Perhaps this would serve as a reminder of our primary stage and help the sole survivor personality step onto the stage of maturity in writing as she progresses. And of course, to bear a blind eye towards the ugly and mindless side of consumerism.